Monday, November 24, 2008

There's More To It Than Just Do It


We've blogged before about men calling for couples to have daily sex for anywhere from a month to an entire year to improve their marriages. The latest call to action was reported in the New York Times, as if it's never happened before. Rev. Ed Young advised his flock to have sex every day for seven days to strengthen their marriage--a feat at which even he failed, by the way.
After the weeklong challenge was over, he advised couples to continue to "double up on the amount of intimacy we have in marriage. And when I say intimacy, I don't mean holding hands in the park or a back rub." See, this is one reason some women don't want to have sex every day. Because so many men neglect the less goal-oriented types of intimacy such as holding hands in the park and back rubs. I can't help wondering if Rev. Young issued the challenge so he could get laid more often himself.
Only he knows for sure, but my advice to him: Double up on affection and true emotional intimacy, and maybe you won't have to drag your entire congregation into the act to get yourself laid more often. Check out the Relevant Church in Tampa, which calls for 30 days of daily sex but also actually advises participants about communication, emotional intimacy and mutual satisfaction.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

I believe that it's deplorable that as the head of a congregation, that man has not learned how to communicate effectively with people.

He's a misguided man, so he believes that by wetting his willy, he can be truly in touch with a woman. This is the reason he's no longer married…

While it's true that in any relationship that if you spend less time talking and more time screwing you'll have less opportunity to fight, you will also have more chance to misunderstand each other when you do communicate.

But if you are truly intimate with each other (and no, not just holding hands), and not just inserting peg A into slot B all the time, you will find that you start to really open up to each other and know each other quite well.

I am happily married, and have been to the same man for the last 19 (almost 20) years.

Ok, Ok.... I take some of that back, I admit it, not ALL of that time has been totally happy, People fight, relationships are hard to maintain. Marriages ARE work, always. But they are so worth it.

When you make a commitment to do something for the rest of your life (in sickness and health for better or worse), before God and your whole family, that should mean something more than getting laid.

If you are serious and you really want your marriage to be successful, I believe that part of that means being intimate down to the core of your entire soul. Not just physically but also spiritually and emotionally, both people have to want the same thing and be willing to work at it forever, even if it hurts sometimes, and forgiving when it does.

Susan Edwards said...

Amen, sister! Well said.

"gunner" said...

"bravo zulu" to "anonymous", she's got it right.
"gunner"
(42 years married as of 3 december 2008)

Susan Edwards said...

Wow, if you've been married 42 years, I'd say that makes you something of an expert! Congratulations and happy anniversary.